Am I in the Wrong Career… Even Though I’ve Been Successful? S6E4

What if your career is not a mistake, but simply preparation for what comes next? 

Episode Summary

You have built a career where you are successful and well-respected. From the outside, it seemed like the perfect role that you would eventually retire in. But underneath, something has shifted, and you are starting to wonder if you are in the wrong job. In this episode, we explore why a fulfilling career can suddenly feel heavy and why this shift means you are simply entering a new season of life. 

If you have been feeling:

• Exhausted from pretending your current role still fits 
• Afraid that wanting a change means your past efforts were wasted 
• Disoriented by the thought of losing your professional identity 

This conversation will help you understand your current season and determine what it requires of you now.

What You’ll Learn

• The four main pain points that make career transitions feel incredibly uncomfortable. 
• Why outgrowing your career is a sign of recalibration, not regression. 
• How to identify which of the four career seasons you are currently experiencing. 
• The importance of allowing yourself to grieve an old identity before stepping into a new one. 
• Why clarity is a moving target that evolves as your personal values grow. 

Key Insight

Clarity is not a destination you reach once and stay at forever; your career was a calling for that specific season, and now you are ready for a different expression of it. 

Quick Self-Check

• Are you trying to manage a gap between your public performance and your private experience? 
• What season of life are you in right now? 
• What does this current season require of you? 

Next Steps

Take the Career Season Diagnostic to find out exactly where you are and what to focus on next at  www.sherimiterco.com/careerquiz

Ready to make a transition? I am opening five spots for my new signature coaching program, CALLED, launching in May. Book a call to see if it is the right next step for you at www.sherimiterco.com or 

https://calendly.com/sherimiterco/claritycall

Let’s continue the conversation beyond the podcast.

🔗 Connect with Sheri

Website: www.sherimiterco.com
Facebook & LinkedIn: @SheriMiter

Additional Resources:

📘 Get your copy of the Discovering Your Calling Book

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Matthew 5:14-16 is the inspiration for this podcast.
Gallup®, Clifton StrengthsFinder®, StrengthsFinder®, the 34 Clifton StrengthsFinder® theme names are trademarks of Gallup, Inc.

Transcript

Sheri Miter 0:00

You've built a career you thought was your dream. You're really good at it. And people respect you. But somewhere along the way, something shifted. And now you're wondering, has this all been a big mistake? Well, today in today's episode, my friend, you're going to discover why the career that felt like your calling for the past decade or two or maybe three for some of you might have been your calling for that season. And then we're going to talk about what does that even mean for what comes next? Welcome to the Discovering Your Calling podcast. I'm your host, Jerry Miter. I'm here to help you unleash your strengths and get clarity on your calling. I believe when you find your purpose in life, fulfillment, joy, and success will follow. If you're ready, pop in those earbuds, hit that follow button, and join me on this journey toward discovering your calling. So yeah, so you've spent 10, 15, maybe 20 or more years building something that felt like the perfect career. And again, you're really, really good at it. You've been successful, you're well respected, and it seemed like the perfect career that you would retire in. But lately, something has shifted. And now you're starting to wonder, has this career all been a mistake? Did I miss something else I was supposed to be doing? Am I in the wrong job? And here's what I want you to know. And what I want you to think about is what if that wasn't a mistake? What if what you've been doing has been preparation for what comes next? What if the career that felt like you're calling for all those years was exactly that, but for that season of your life? And I know if you're just listening to this little tidbit, you might be thinking, and you might be asking, well, Sherry, if that isn't, if this isn't about the wrong career or failure, then why does it feel so hard to think about making a career change right now? And I get it. I've been there, I've experienced it, and a lot of my clients have as well. And I want you to know there are four main pain points that make us feel really uncomfortable when we start thinking about switching careers when our last career has been good. One is the identity grief of no longer being the person who, and you fill in the blank. You know, you've maybe you've been a lawyer or the nurse or the consultant for so long that when you start questioning that role, you're not just questioning a job, you're questioning your entire identity. And that's really disorienting in a way most people don't ever talk about. And then we have the fear that leaving means admitting we were wrong, maybe wrong about the career choice. Maybe there's this quiet fear that if you leave, you're admitting you've made a mistake, that all those years of studying and working hard and late nights were wasted. And that maybe you should have known better. But here's the truth: leaving doesn't mean you were wrong. It means you were learning. And again, it was for that season. And now you've grown yourself and you're just ready for what's next. Nothing was wrong. You weren't wrong. You've just changed and grown. Then we have that pressure to have it all figured out by now. You know, we we think that by age 30 or 40 or 50 or 60 even, we should have it all figured out. But, you know, instead of questioning that and questioning everything that we've been doing, and I know that can feel like you're behind, like you've missed something along the way. But here's the truth clarity isn't a destination you reach once and stay at forever. And what felt aligned at 30 probably isn't going to fit at 45. And what fits at 40 probably won't fit at 55. You grow. Your values evolve. That's not regression, it's growth asking for recalibration. I'm going to repeat that. It's not regression, it's growth asking for recalibration. And then the other thing I see a lot is that people are just exhausted. They're exhausted because they're pretending that the fit is still good. They're pre- but this pretending, it's draining because it requires you to override your natural instincts, to suppress your real strengths that are calling to emerge. And you're trying to manage this gap between your public performance and your private experience and what you really, really feel like you want to be doing today. And over time, that gap becomes unstainable. The energy it takes to maintain this facade leaves little left for the work itself or for your life outside of work. And it just makes you tired. But I want to normalize this. I want to normalize this feeling, this experience, because if you are feeling this, first I want you to know you are not alone and that there is nothing wrong with you or the work you've been doing. It's all about being in a transition season, and transition requires something different from you. The question itself is misframed. It's not about, am I in the wrong career? The question we need to be asking is what season am I in? And what does this season require of me? Or what do I want in this season of life? And, you know, I was thinking about this, and it brought me back to a season in our lives when we lived in the country on eight acres of land. And it was the perfect place to raise our three boys. They had space to run, they had woods to play in with their paintball, forts that nobody cared about. They had their, you know, our ATV, you know, room to just grow and explore and be outside all the time. And the house was big enough. And it was exactly what our little family or growing family needed in that season of life. It was a great place to raise those boys. And I loved that season. And I loved that house. I had a big, beautiful front porch that I had dreamed about with a front porch swing. But you know, that season passed. And our boys grew up, and they all have homes of their own now. And today, as empty nesters, you know, we sold that house a long time ago. And now, today we enjoy living, my husband and I, in a luxury apartment that's within walking distance of our favorite restaurants, the farmer's market, which we're headed to here shortly after I record this podcast, and all of the things we love. We love the freedom. If if we want to travel, all we have to do is make sure the cat's taken care of and walk out the door and lock it. There's no maintenance to worry about. Now, both homes were wonderful, and both were exactly right for the season of life we were in or are in. And your career works the same way. The role that felt like home for 15 years, the one where you built your reputation, learned your craft, proved yourself. That was your eight acres in the country season. It was exactly what you needed then. But now you might be ready for your walkable, walkable apartment season. Something that fits who you are now, not who you were then when you started. It fits your values, it fits your the freedom you want in your life, it fits what strengths you want to use and what you've discovered about yourself from all those years of working in your other job, your other career, your other calling. Because yes, we can have multiple callings, my friend. And here is what I've come to believe about calling: that it's not always something you find once and hold on to forever. Sometimes it's something you become ready for. It is those multiple callings, just like many of us have multiple homes. And that career that felt like a calling when you were in your country house season, building your expertise, proving yourself, raising your professional reputation, that was all real and it all mattered. But now you are ready for a different expression of that calling. And again, one that fits the season you're in today. So those 15, 10, 15, 20 years you spent that maybe now feels like you're in the wrong career, they weren't wasted. They were the readiness period. They built the foundation of what comes next. And they served the purpose of that season. And you can choose what you take with you into the next season. That's the great thing about this place in life. And you know, just like we did with our home. Now, some of the furniture when we sold that country home on eight acres did not come with us. We had a lot of antiques back then. They don't fit in our luxury apartment building. But we kept the most precious things. Like right now, I'm looking over at a little side table that my grandfather built. There's nothing fancy about it, but it comes with it will come with me till the end of time. And of course, family photos and things that were precious to us. And just like that with your career, you can choose what comes with you in the next season and what stays behind that no longer fits who you are or what you want to be known for. And what's most important that I want you to understand right now is finding out what career season are you actually in. And I've talked about this before on the podcast and introduced the four career seasons. This is something what I believe they are. There may be more for sure. This is just a Sherry Mitre thought. Take what you want, leave the rest behind. But I believe there are four seasons that we can be in. Number one is the stay and strengthen. And this is when you are in the right house or the right career. And the goal there is to focus on growth, not change. And then we have the adjust and realign season. And this is where the house is mostly right, but something needs to shift. Maybe in the house analogy, you need to call in the interior decorator to come help you, you know, change the wallpaper, change the furniture a little bit. You can do that with your career as well. Then we have the explore what's possible. This is when you become curious. And using our house analogy, maybe you start touring some open houses. Maybe you just start peeking out. What else is out there? Where else could I live? Imagining what's next. And you can do the same thing with your career. It just starts testing things out. Maybe it's time to start. Could I monetize a hobby I've had? Maybe it's just exploring things. What else is possible out there? Letting yourself dream a little bit. And then we have the fourth stage, and this is the ready for a strategic leap. This is when you know, you know, you know, you know, it is time to move. That the season, the house, the career, whatever we want to use now, no longer fits. And it is time to make that transition. And the focus here is about making sure it's a smart transition, that you have a strategic plan. And you don't just do things willy-nilly. Um, so what's the plan behind making the strategic leap? Once you know your career season, that changes everything. Because here's here's the thing: the advice that you might receive in one season could be really terrible advice in another season. And a lot of times, career advice assumes you either need to stay or you need to go. And there's a lot of options in between. And if you stay, how do you make it better? And if you go, what's the plan behind it? So the real question you need to be asking right now is what season am I in? And what does that season require of me? So here's one more thing that we need to talk about here, because it's something else that I feel like is not often expressed, but it's super, super important to talk about. And that's the grief. The grief that comes from letting go of one thing to move into the next, even if they're both great. You know, when we were in the process of selling our house and we knew it was the right move, we were excited about the freedom it was going to give us to not live on eight acres of land where it took 20 minutes to drive to the grocery store or a store, and that no longer served us. We knew it was the right move, but it doesn't mean we didn't mourn the loss of giving up that home, of selling that home. And I distinctly remember one day driving back home when we still had the house, and Tim McGraw's uh song Mama's House was new then, and it came on the radio, and I had to pull over on the side of the road because I started crying so hard. And I am not an easy crier, like that's not my natural way of being. But I started bawling my eyes out and I started wondering: are we making a mistake? Like, am I ready to let go of this home where we raised our boys? Am I ready to get let go of this front porch and that swing and all the memories from sitting out there and the lazy days of watching my boys play or watching a sunset or having a cocktail with my husband? You know, that house held so much for us, so many memories, so many milestones. And letting go of it was not easy, even though we knew the next place was the right place for us. Even though we knew that that would give my husband and I a new freedom to fulfill all of our dreams as a couple without our kids living at home anymore. And the same thing happened to me when I chose to leave behind my Mary Kay um leadership position. I was there for 26 years. And I loved that job. It was my calling in that season. And I mourned that too. I mourned letting go of that identity of the community, the version of myself I'd been for so long. And I want you to hear this, my friend, if you're feeling that too. That grief that we feel when we're deciding to make a major change in our lives, it does not mean that we made a wrong decision. It just meant that we're honoring what matters to us. So allow yourself time to grieve when you're leaving something, whether it be a house or a career. But know that the moving forward is the right decision if you've done it with discernment. Grief is not saying you shouldn't do something, and it isn't a detour. It's part of the transition. And it's how you honor the season you're closing before you fully step into the next one. But here's the thing, here's the other side of that. What I didn't expect by the change of homes or the change of careers was the freedom, the energy, the sense of rightness that comes from living in a season that actually fits where we are today. Yes, the grief was real, but my friend, the reward is really real too. So if you're sitting here and you're wondering, well, what season am I in? Is it time to start packing up this career and moving to the next one? Or is it time to stay? Should I stay it out? I want to help you get clarity on that. And I created something that is called the career season diagnostic. You might have heard me call talking about this previously in other episodes called the quiz, but we're gonna rename it because we realize that this is way more than a quiz. And it's a strategic tool that tells you exactly where you are and what you need to focus on next. It takes about two minutes. I think there's 10 questions in it, and you can head over to my website www.sherry miterco forward slash career quiz. But like I said, don't let the name quiz fool you. It's so much more than that. And we'll have the link in the show notes, but that's gonna tell you exactly what season you're in. Are you in that stay and strengthen? Are you in that adjust and realign or explore what's possible? Or are you ready for a strategic leap? Answer the questions, honestly, and let your diagnostic tell you. And it comes with what to do next. I don't leave you hanging. So you'll receive a couple emails from me that give you information on what that identified identified that season and then what to do about it. And my friend, if you're listening to this, or maybe after you take the diagnostic and you realize it is time to start packing up this career and moving into the next phase of your life, let's talk. I'm opening up five spots for called, my brand new signature coaching program. And we're launching in May. So this is for women who are done wondering and are ready to move into what's next. And if that's you, let's hop on a call and see if called is the right next step for you. The link to book a call is in the show notes, or you can find the details to connect with me on my website. Again, www.sherymiterco.com. And here's what I want you to know. You don't have to have it all figured out. You just need to know your season. And once you know that, the next step becomes clear. So take the diagnostic, see where you are, and if you're ready to move, I'm here. Think of me as you're like two men in a truck ready to help you move. Now, I'm not gonna help you move out of your house, but I can help you move from one career to the next. So thanks for listening, and I'll see you next time. And that's gonna be a fun podcast because you'll hear when a guest turns the coaching table around and coaches me on pricing. Hmm, don't miss that one. Thank you for spending this time with me. My hope is something you heard today inspires you to take action toward discovering your calling. I just have two favors to ask of you before you go. One, if you found value and enjoyed this episode, please leave us a review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify, and you might hear your review read on a future episode. And two, can you share this episode with three friends who will also enjoy it as much as you did? By doing these things, you will help us grow the podcast to make a bigger impact on the world. And until next week, remember, you've been created to live a life of fulfillment, freedom, purpose, success, and joy.